In the immortal words of actor Robert De Niro from the 2001 Hollywood film 15 Minutes, "sometimes you gotta go away to come back..."

Prateli, I have been quite absent these past three weeks, gone AWOL on blog posts and clueless on replies to your always astute observant comments. Though I return bearing news!

Know this: "We beat the East, in every possible way."

If anyone were ever in need of due convincing as to the might of our Czech nation compared to our former Bloc confreres, I suggest a weeklong spin through the lands our eastern neighbours to imbue yourself with a stiff shot of "cultural religion."

My past week here in the Romanian capital of Bucharest was endlessly enlightening. As you'll very shortly see, I've fallen back in love again -- deeply -- with the Czech nation and Praguers, never again to be lead astray. While this might have something to do with my resurgent love life (Miluju te, IV!), I'll permit you be the judge of that.

** Bucharest has some of the most atrocious traffic I've ever witnessed in a European capital. Sure, sure. You'll tell me how London's or Paris' gridlock is enough to try even the most zen-like of souls. But, babies, you ain't seen nothing yet until you've ambled about (Nicolae) Ceausescu's Former Playground. Have a listen here to a day in the life (cca 17h) of Bucharest...at 21C on the temperature dial.

** Petty thieving from friends, colleagues, partners, lovers, co-workers, and shopkeepers -- while immoral -- is all the rage in Bucharest. You can chuck this rule out the window in the case of large Western corporations (egs. Orange, Radisson SAS, Porsche, etc.), though a few rungs down on the totem pole I suggest you keep your hands flush on your pockets and your eyes wide open. Bucharesters avail themselves of the "five-fingered discount" with zero shame.

** Emotional outbursts, road rage, idiotic soccer hooliganism, and arrogant machismo are par for the Romanian course. I travel down here often, though each time during my ride into downtown Bucharest from the city's Otopeni Airport (OTP), I just can't get over how much the city reminds me of a Middle Eastern-cum-European metropole. My first impression of Bucharest when I touched down many months ago was: welcome to the Gaza Strip...North.

** Bucharest's restaurant/bar servers are surly, flippant, and hopelessly jammed in a post-communist time warp. Shall I tell you how many times I've taken a seat in a trendy Bucharest cafe only to be left stranded without a clue for 10 minutes (and more!) without a single staffperson asking me if I needed anything?! (Indeed, I'd only stayed the first time as a test...now I just walk out). Then, when you're done that drink or meal, you'd think someone would ask you "jestli date si jeste neco?" Knock, knock, Sherlock. Maybe I'm Prague-spoiled, but I just can't wait to get home...

Bucharest has the people (3 million citizen officially, 6 million unofficially!), the investment, and -- admittedly -- its young people are a great deal more linguistically talented than our Czech and Slovak youngsters. Head practically anywhere in the Romanian capital and you'll invariably find people who speak English, French, and Italian rolled up into one! Given that both Romania and the Czech Republic maintain all their imported films and television programs in their original languages with subtitles, it's a wonder why Romania is beating us on the language sweepstakes. That, my friends, is fodder for another post.

But if Czechs needed any more convincing as to the greatness of their national story and potentials, take a trip to Romania.

I have missed you these weeks, my friends. I can't wait to get home.

--ADM