Adam Daniel Mezei

14. 05.

Problems With the EU Presidency

Adam Daniel Mezei Přečteno 11918 krát

(author's note: written a year before these events transpired...and how little things have changed...)

The concept of the six month revolving EU Council Presidency has shown that Europe is in serious in need of strong leadership. The act of constantly swapping the person in charge every half-year takes a serious toll on the smooth functioning of this bloc. It's the equivalent to building a slew of foundations all over the place, then leaving them partially finished. Rotation is quixotic and capricious, and it's no way to run the twenty-seven Member States' affairs.

It has taken some time for the concept of the EU being run by smaller post-Communist states to take root. Slovenia, as of this writing, has been the only former Bloc country which has succeeded in helming Europe -- sandwiched, as was, between the more capable Portuguese and French Presidencies -- so as to ensure the emerging democracy wouldn't go astray.

For now, this is the trust which the larger European powers have entrusted to their junior partners in the Union, not content to permit them to run free without chaperoning. But the net effect has been like riding a horse with blinders. Western Europe remains unsure of these lesser former Bloc powers, almost as if they are saying that one impetuous decision taken absent of the Greater Powers' guidance will spell doom for the entire Union.

Surely, one can see the logic in this from the perspective of nations like France, the UK, Germany, and Spain. Handing off the reins of power to Slovenia or -- in 2009 -- the Czech Republic could have tremendous ramifications for continental immigration policy. A nation, say, like France, with an atrocious record in dealing with its migrants, or, say, Germany, a state with a complicated relationship vis-a-vis its newcomers as well, will hardly be as forthcoming in remedying these domestic problems through a radical pan-EU approach to immigration law.

But a smaller nation like, say, Slovenia would have greater incentive to introduce radical migration policy as a way of making waves as a small player in a much larger body where it cannot possibly hope to make much of an impact. Since it only has one way of standing out, through its policy directives, this would appear to be its most successful strategy.

Plaguing the rotating European Presidency is also its inherent design faults. The way it's currently set up is that smaller, more intrepid, nations aren't currently permitted to retain the Council Presidency twice consecutively. For instance, the Czech Republic is part of a "troika," whereby it will be hemmed in between both France before and Sweden immediately after. It's a tacit signal larger Member States convey to the newer joiners: "The benefits of Membership are yours to enjoy, but leave the complex governing of the Union to the big boys, will ya?"

The Troika System is yet another of those silent signals by large states to small that the potential introduction of a controversial law which wealthier members don't unanimously support can be duly reversed during a subsequent Presidency. Policies promoted by the smaller Council Presidency states (egs. Slovenia, the Czech Republic) that are contrary to the interests of the larger members, who stand to lose a great deal more from the introduction of radical policies than the smaller nations, will likely be overturned. In essence, the larger members act like bullies, ganging up on the smaller members.

Since there's no track record for how something like this should transpire, expect to see several such reversals at the conclusion of the Czech Council Presidency, a half-year period which will be dominated for the most part by euroscepticism and contrariness on direct orders from Prague Castle.

(excerpted from A SAD AND TRAGIC TALE OF MISTER DOUH, by Adam Daniel Mezei)

04. 05.

4-1-9

Adam Daniel Mezei Přečteno 11779 krát

Allow me to teach you a new expression: "4-1-9."

I heard some of the guys on the street shouting it today so I asked Efe what it means.

He explains:

"4-1-9 is the name of a scam Nigerians will pull when they travel abroad. It is named after the section in the Nigerian Criminal Code -- 419 -- under which you will get charged if you commit any sort of fraud crime in Nigeria."

I'm sorry, but I have a hard time believing how any native Nigerian -- save for the most naive of village simpletons -- could be swindled out of anything in Nigeria short of a pile of street dust. If you grew up in one of Nigeria's hulking cities, this is a lesson you learn early on in school. You hear of tales of swindle and lucre during dinner table chatter or in discussions at family gatherings, and these are hardly the stuff of legend. You are aware of the nature of Nigerian society, and are well-insulated from scams.

Now when I hear "4-1-9" in town, I'll know what's going down, or at least what's about to go down.

"4-1-9!"

A trio of Africans will tag team against a large crowd of drunken Brits, for example, angling on the leader of the wolf pack. They'll work him over with words, promises, and praise, gradually wearing him down, as he's normally the least drunk of the horde (well someone's got to be alert at the wheel), until he suddenly announces to this wandering drunken mob of yobs they'll be heading to such-such "bar" for the remainder of the evening. The Prague 4-1-9 scam begins on the strength of promises made by the African man on the street. What happens inside the club is the subject matter for an entirely different book.

I'm always stunned how they can do this, each and every time. Not impressed by the scam as much as I am by their dogged tenacity. People make light of the Africans' skill, but here why they shouldn't dismiss it:

Guts: it takes raw guts to approach complete strangers in the street with requests for anything. A fear and fatigue factor must kick in after a certain number of harsh, even racist, rejections, though that hardly seems to put a damper on the Africans' enthusiasm. They return, night after boring night to hammer away like boxers at their speed bags. As for their staying power? Simply remarkable. Anyone who criticizes what they do for a living without first having tried the job should challenge themselves for a night to see if they have what it takes. Despite the rough and tumble nature of the job profile, it's not about being rude and crude. There's a delicate artistry to it, as I've come to learn.

Perseverance: it takes a world of perseverance to hit the streets night after night without admitting humiliation into your thoughts. Even a man forced to accept a job he truly doesn't want to do -- thinking about the more educated Africans in the thicket -- eventually tires from the inanity of the work, in particular after being raked over the coals more times than he can count. The ability to "slough off" the heaped-on sarcastic scorn is quite a skill.

Perceptive abilities: the perceptive abilities of the average African street worker in Prague is infinitely more attuned than that of the comparative Czech office worker. It's because these Africans are busy! They don't waste a moment in eventually isolating a crowd's leader. Their inner radars are attuned to the slightest change in body language, eye movement, and they seem to possess a highly developed sense of when things are flowing smoothly. It comes from nights of practice, night after night, in all sorts of weather, without fail.

"Never say die:" The Africans I've met never say "die." The dearth of Czech employers prepared to take a chance on them in more dignified employment circles isn't something the Africans take lying down. They wear their pride on their sleeves. They continue to hustle, strive, and are passionate pursuers of a single cause -- to be solvent and secure enough before climbing to the next rung of accomplishment on the Prague career ladder. So they demonstrate their consummate skills in the areas presently permitted to them.

Resistance to cold: Northerners -- be ashamed at the Africans' resistance to the elements! It's mostly a matter of acclimatization, but after several months chasing down reluctant customers in sub-zero temperatures, they cease complaining about the cold and just knuckle down to get the job done. Perhaps the debate about which is the superior genetic model is now settled?

419's are indeed evil, though I've heard from not only Douh, but also from Efe and Mohammed and some of the other guys, how club owners will occasionally top that by double-crossing the roving promoters of their nightly takes. This has prompted the Africans to band together, working in close-knit teams and maintaining a cumulative "head count," which allows them to know -- down to the minute -- how many "incomings" the club owes them commissions for. I've even seen how they relay these details to each other by text within the confines of a specific sector over the course of a shift. Tourists to Prague would hardly suspect this exists.

I am hardly a advocate of people getting swindled, though I am slightly less than democratic in this regard when it comes to the drunken brutes who invade the city I live. I'm sure there are many Praguers who would agree with me on this score. Law enforcement is strict in the countries where they come from, so why do they toss their scruples out the window when touching down in Prague? Why do they strip down to their dirty drawers in sub-zero temperatures, howling to the moon like coyotes while hopped up on drugs and alcohol, then vomiting in the middle of the tourist district where people are enjoying their meal or sitting with their families and children?

As Douh tells me about some of the recent 419s he's witnessed, part of me inside is smiling.

(excerpted from A Sad and Tragic Tale of Mister Douh, by Adam Daniel Mezei)

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Problems With the EU Presidency

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